Harley Hymen – Bounty Hunter Extraordinaire

By Lea Ann Golden

Harley sighed as she looked out the windowof the Lear jet.  She led a glamorous life, there was no denying it, but the life of a bounty hunter was also hectic.  She hadn’t slept for days.  She was so tired, she was even seeing clouds in her coffee.  She was on her way to Nova Scotia.  Her boss was sending her there to apprehend a dangerous drug kingpin. This case was not like any other Harley had been involved in, however.   The guy she was after was Warren (beady-eyed) Blackwell, and his wife was a good friend.  Carmen Blackwell had been Harley’s roommate freshman year at Saratoga Community College. Ever since she’d received this assignment, Harley had wondered if Carmen knew about her husband’s drug dealing.  Over the years, they had kept in touch and Harley had always wondered how they could afford all the luxurious homes and cars and the yacht.  Now it all made sense.  He was the number one drug dealer in all of Nova Scotia. After receiving the assignment, she had begged off when she heard Warren’s name.  But the boss wouldn’t change his mind.  He tried to sweeten the deal by telling her that while she was there, there would be a total eclipse of the sun.  Even that didn’t make her want this job, but she had no choice. She realized that after she nabbed Warren, Carmen would never talk to her again.  Of course, if Carmen knew the dirty secret that she and Warren shared, she would never speak to her anyway.  One drunken night freshman year in her dorm room, while Carmen was away at a swim meet, she and Warren had hooked up.  He had plied her with drinks and told her they made a pretty pair.  She was still quite naïve.  As the plane landed, Harley remembered how awful she felt at the time.

Now she was about to crash the party that Warren was throwing on his yacht.  He’d get the shock of his life when she threw the handcuffs on him in front of all of his guests.  Wearing a disguise so he wouldn’t recognize her, with her hat strategically dipped below one eye, she adjusted her apricot scarf.  Harley admired her disguise as she entered the door and passed a mirror. Girls were lining up to be Warren’s next dance partner, but Harley knew how to step to the head of the line.  She pulled out a bong.  Warren came to attention.  Whether he was enraptured by her beauty or whether the bong made him think she was a buyer, no matter.  He was headed her way.  As soon as he got within arm’s reach, Harley said “You’re insane, I bet you think this bong is about you, you’re insane.”  Then, quick as a wink, she had him in cuffs. She felt happy to know that he would soon be where he should be all the time –prison.  Another bounty case closed.

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3 Responses to Harley Hymen – Bounty Hunter Extraordinaire

  1. Kim Akimoto says:

    “You’re insane, I bet you think this bong is about you, you’re insane.” Hehehehe, love it Lea Ann!

  2. waxings says:

    Great twist Lea Ann. I can see Harley Hymen giving Stephanie Plum a run for her money!

    • Lea Ann Golden says:

      That is what inspired me, my recent addition of the Stephanie Plum novels to my reading list (so far I’ve only read the first two, so I’ve got a ways to go) and my love of the song “You’re So Vain” by Carly Simon. Thanks for the positive feedback!

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